Monthly Archives:: November 2011

Now to celebrate the true meaning of Thanksgiving by flushing a months worth of food for a third-world village down the toilet.

Mary went out the door to church this morning with her witch halloween costume on (with hat).

Krazee Glue: “bonds to skin instantly upon contact”

In the office. Not wearing pants.

I was just attacked by a giraffe.

Addie and I went to Chic-Filet for dinner. We both got a chocolate shake for dessert. Now what are all these boys doing in my yard?

Me (after being smacked in the face by a branch on my bike ride home): Did you see my face? Wife: Why, what happened? Oh my gosh! Did you break your nose? It’s all swollen and crooked! Me: Uh, no. I scratched my lip. But thanks for letting me know about my big crooked nose.

Mary (flexing): I have strong muscles Me: Yes you do Mary: I could probably kill one of the kids at school Me: .. Mary: I could kill you